Depressing CNY

(Updated)
Things are a tad better now. After all the crying...

However, still not sure if being in a relationship will be good for us or not.

It'll be so weird not being together...

I don't know man. Urgh.

Plus i said some things to him which i think he will remember for the rest of his life. It'll be like a permanent scar cus i don't think he will ever forget it.

Oh well...we'll see how things go...

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I want to go on dates and fall in love all over again.

:(

I hope i know what i'm doing and i'll stick to what i said.

Being single ain't that hard? After all it'll mean more freedom, no?

Maybe i should concentrate on my business now. Love can wait! Plus we can still be friends and all...since it's hard for him to change for the better for me.

I mean, if he'd rather go on proper outings with his friends and not me, that means something right? Cannot remember when the last time we went out on a movie date... We only meet at haji and he sends me home the end fullstop no sweet lovey dovey dates and all. :( Don't like it when he feels so comfortable with me that he thinks he doesn't have to treat me that well anymore.

But still, a part of me refuses to let go of this guy. Though i know i should. I shouldn't let love bring me down. I shouldn't tolerate all the shit if i don't like to.

All i'm asking is to be treated more like a girlfriend...

Normal couples should still go on dates right! :( How come my relationship's like that!!

Do you think it's too much to ask for? :(

Omg why am i even blogging about this. It's so stupid...i actually remember having a similar post a few months back. It's a freakin' cycle. Sick of it. Urgh.

So anyhowz that's my sad, depressing CNY for you. Yup. SAD HUH.