Friday, June 5, 2009

Insomnia

I really can't sleep...

I've been sleeping really little lately. Each time my head touches my pillow, i start sobbing uncontrollably and will get up and not dare lie down again. I am scaring myself. My period is here again. It just ended a week ago? How is that possible? It's the 3rd day and it doesn't seem like it's going to stop anytime soon. I've been eating and eating so much. I can spend $50 at the supermarket and wipe out all the food in less than 5 hours. Whenever i stop munching on something for over an hour, i feel my stomach growling. I dont know if it's my imagination or what. It's really scaring me seriously. I don't know what's happening. 

I need to know how you're doing now.....i really really really need to know. I know you don't wanna see me like that but i can't get back to my usual self without knowing if you're ok or not. 

This is killing me. 

Plus....

Countless of complaints for the online store thanks to the new system sending out excess invoices....too many people to refund...too many problems it's hard to follow everyone's prob. Never happened before. I need you to calm me down. When you were helping me everything was so smooth....i never felt this stressed up and never wanted to give up this bad. You know how much my business means to me don't you? To have the intention to give it up, it must be really bad. You've seen how i always flare up and get so fucking angry with myself when i make a mistake or two....now, believe it or not, i made over 100 mistakes. Thats 100 times the anger.

FML. 

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