Sometimes, when we see a friend who is single for a pretty long time, we'd go "Why still no boyfriend?" and the standard answer? "Nobody wants me lah!".
Well, that is because a lot of Single men/women out there are shy and do not know how to make new friends. I know how much courage it takes for someone to walk up to someone to talk to them. Rejection aint a wonderful thing. Also, there's another group of people, people who hold 9am-5pm jobs. Especially if you are a guy and the industry you are in lacks of girls. Because they are hardly around girls, they don't know how to approach girls when they are out. Plus, most of them don't go out after working hours so they can go years without making new friends.
But when one day, you finally find the solution to meeting strangers and getting the chance to go out with them...HOW WILL YOU FARE?
Below this post, i have shared the solution for shy singles ready to mingle! So in this post are 10 THINGS YOU SHOULD NOT DO ON A FIRST DATE.
Tip #1 DO NOT MAKE YOUR DATE WAIT
Try to be 5 min earlier than the time agreed if possible. Some people think girls are allowed to be late but guys aren't allowed to. Who teach you one? Don't go 10 min beyond the agreed meeting timing because no one likes waiting. Guys say they don't mind waiting for girls to get ready but do you really think they enjoy waiting?? Nobody does - they'd rather not! It is important to start the it off in the right mood.
Tip #2 DO NOT TALK ABOUT YOUR EX
Sometimes we go on dates when we're still heart broken and mending a broken heart but this is one thing we should not do or we will never be over the ex. If you honestly wish to get over your ex, then DO NOT TALK ABOUT HIM/HER. You should be more interested in knowing more about your new date than your ex. Instead of missing the one who got away, try focus on what you have at the moment. Do not say things like "My ex and I... used to come here all the time"...what do you expect your date to say???
Tip #3 DO NOT OVER DRESS
And i do not mean you should under dress too. Wear something simple and appropriate. Look presentable, neat but not too over the top. Doing "too much" can make you look intimidating or makes you looking like you're "trying too hard to impress". Try to look as effortless as you can (but how long it really took you to clean up that well...only you know!). This reminds me of the times i really regret putting too much make up when i'm out with a guy i like. I'd try a new way of drawing my eye liner hoping it'll make me look prettier. I wished i didn't slap so much make up and tried so hard to make myself look perfect because i always end up looking like a big mess when i try too hard. However when i go simple and go for the "barely there" make up, i get more compliments. It's like a reverse effect.
Tip #4 DO NOT ASK HER "SO WHAT SHOULD WE DO NOW"
This is a very important tip for the boys. Most of the time, you'll hear "Don't know? Up to you?" when you ask the question so DON'T EVEN BOTHER ASKING. Girls like guys who put in effort in planning and girls love surprises! When you put in effort in planning a nice date full of surprises for her, it becomes a date she'll not forget. You want to make an impact and be different from the rest. Remember to always come up with Plan B in case Plan A fails!
Tip #5 DO NOT ACT ALOOF
Yeah, you know girls like cool guys. But really, what most girls want are guys who look bad but are in actual fact softies by heart! If you keep acting so cool, you'll turn out to be fierce and that may make her feel intimidated, so smile more!! Smiling may help her feel more comfortable and lifts the mood. Not too much though, or you'll look like a creep. Same for girls, guys like chirpy and happy go lucky girls, not stuck up girls so smile! :)
Tip #6 DO NOT EXPECT YOUR DATE TO PAY FOR THE MEAL
This actually applies to both genders. I know many girls think that guys should be the one paying. So you think you deserved it?!?! If it's a first date, as a girl i usually offer to split the bill. Some guys accept it and some reject it. Either way, it is fine with me. Some guys dare not accept because they are afraid they'd look "cheap skate" but i have came across guys who accept it too because they are afraid of saying no to me? Haha. And they are in fact very generous guys after i know them better but just timid and didn't want me to feel offended by rejecting the money i placed in front of him. So yeah, do just let this one point be the "Deal Breaker". Like if he doesn't pay for your share, you think he ain't a gentleman because that's not always the case. If he offers to pay for the meal, that is great too. At least you offered to pay for your own share instead of sitting back and waiting for him to take his credit card out. I am sure that you will leave a good impression!
Tip #7 DO NOT USE YOUR PHONE TOO MUCH
We turn to our phones when we feel bored and awkward. During a first date, try to not touch it at all even if you feel bored and awkward because it puts your date in a difficult position and he/she would end up taking our his/her phone to use too. This might turn into something uncomfortable after awhile. Sometimes when we're out on a date and our bestie texts us things like "so how's everything going?!?!" we'd be so excited to reply and keep him/her in the loop. Well that can wait till when you get home!
Tip #8 DO NOT FLARE UP AT ANYTHING
It's a first date, try to keep the mood happy and uppity all the way! Be graceful and patient about everything. Even the waiter who took a long time to take your order or the one who spilled water on your precious shirt. Or even your date who accidentally said something insulting. Take everything with a pinch of salt. TOLERATE SHIT HAPPENING AROUND.
Tip #9 DO NOT TALK TOO MUCH ABOUT YOURSELF
It is a get to know each other better session but remember to always end your sentence with "what about you?" after you have answered a question about yourself. Sometimes you might have a lot to say about a certain thing but always remember not to get too carried away. Make sure your date is listening and not drifting away by asking her questions! From her answer and tone, you can easily tell if she's interested in what you are saying. If it doesn't sound so good, change the topic.
Tip #10 DO NOT WALK AHEAD OF HER
Do not walk too fast. If you want to lead the way, always remember to look back and back sure he/she is no more than an arm length away. I have encountered this before and i really HATE walking behind and worst, if he does not look back to check on me. Sometimes i feel like a dog following him around. :/ I know sometimes it isn't intentional but i really can't help but to feel that way. If you are a guy you are usually the one "leading the way" and walking faster so that means you have to open doors for her. Be it the door of the restaurant, or the car door. Shows that chivalry is not completely dead and you score brownie points.
Now that i have shared some the things you shouldn't do so you can have a great date and some chance of progression! :)
GOOD LUCK!